25 Days: THE SANTA CLAUSE

At this time of year, it's important to remember that Santa Claus started out as vulgar advertising executive for a toy company before killing the previous Santa and being forced into his eternal role as punishment.

THE SANTA CLAUSE    (FAMILY/FANTASY-COMEDY, 1994)
Directed by John Pasquin
Starring Tim Allen, Wendy Crews, Judge Reinhold, Eric Lloyd, David Krumholtz, Paige Tamada
PG for a few crude moments.
Naughty or Nice?: Mostly Nice
Cynical or Sentimental?: Very Sentimental
Religious or Secular?: Secular
Holiday Relations: Christmas Is Integral to the Plot
OVERALL: 2.5 out of 4

THE SANTA CLAUSE is a fairly funny movie, at least up until the third act, but what's really funny is how easily the same story could be told as a horror movie.  An oridinary guy accidentally kills Santa Claus and is now forced to become the legend himself, gaining weight at uncontrollable speed, supernatural hair growth and other events that would not be uncommon in a "body horror" film of the 1980s, like THE FLY.
Sadly, that's not the case.  Instead, the same story is told in family-friendly comedic fashion, as Scott Calvin (Tim Allen), divorced dad and toy company advertising executive, finds himself thrust into the role of Father Christmas, when he inadvertently causes the previous Santa to slip and fall from his roof.  Scott's obnoxiously "movie kid" little boy, Charlie (Eric Lloyd), is surprisingly thrilled to see Santa Claus dead at the feet of his dad and eagerly encourages Scott to put on the suit and play Santa.  Finally guilt-tripping Scott into playing along, the two finish Santa's rounds on Christmas Eve, after which the reindeer bring Scott and Charlie to the North Pole, where the elves inform Scott that he is the new Santa from now on.  Naturally, Scott doesn't want to, but the "Santa Clause, the Clause" has bound him to his jolly fate.  Scott wakes up the next morning back in his bed, with the only evidence of the night's adventures being his Santa Claus pajamas (marked "SC"; Santa Claus or Scott Calvin?), a possibly magic snowglobe and Charlie's insistence that it all actually happened.  Scott has resolved that it's all a dream, but Charlie's exuberant obsession with his dad as Santa Claus is now concerning Charlie's mom, Laura (Wendy Crews), and her psychiatrist husband, Neil (Judge Reinhold).  Over the course of the following year, Scott finds himself transforming into Santa, against his every effort.  He begins gaining weight exponentially and craving milk and cookies.  Within only half a day, he goes from clean-shaven to fully-bearded, and hair dye has no effect on his newly silvered hair.  From the viewpoint of Laura and Neil, this looks rather like a disturbing attempt to regain the favor of his son.
THE SANTA CLAUSE is a strange film all around, but generally entertaining and good-spirited right up until the final act of the film as Scott finally embraces his role as Santa and goes about his rounds on Christmas Eve for the second time, and this time with real sincerity.  As much as I prefer Tim Allen's impatient and grouchy Santa routine on his first round (tossing a doll into a Christmas tree and shortly telling a girl that he doesn't want to drink the milk with the cookies, then mockingly mimicking her on his way up the chimney), it's not that I'd criticize the later part of a movie for having a nice Santa Claus.  It's those stupid elves.  Not all of them; just the random British elf and the godawful E.L.F.S. squad (Elite Liberating Flight Squad).  The British elf is just a stupid parody of Q from the 007 films, but the E.L.F.S. tie up a police officer with wrapping ribbon before gagging him with a doughnut (nice example for the kids!), and their captain actually says the line, "We're your worst nightmare: Elves, with attitude."  As if that line weren't stupid enough, the child actor also manages to deliver it in a fashion to match.  I hate that kid.
Elves seem to be the most troublesome element for movies about Santa, as they almost always come off as super creepy (see: THE POLAR EXPRESS), and THE SANTA CLAUSE elves are creepy, but even more so they are annoyingly cloying; sugary-faced children dressed like a Medieval Days festival from the 1950s.  I like Bernard (David Krumholtz), the head elf, though.  He's definitely the most Jewish elf at the North Pole, making sarcastic wisecracks and sharing Neil's taste in bad sweaters (not to make any point about Jewish taste in sweaters).
One of the funniest jokes in the movie went on to become an even funnier real-life event; Laura gives the emergency number of Neil's mom to Scott and he reads it aloud, "1-800-SPANK-ME?  I know that number!"  You won't find that line on any copies released after 1997 though.  A child in Steilacom, Washington call the number and racked up a $400 bill, and I guess the mother didn't see the humor in the situation. 
I think my enjoyment of this movie peaked around 8-10 years old, but eventually the "Christmas magic" of it dissipates, and what your left with is an okay family flick that reminds you that Tim Allen was once a major celebrity.